Humans Win Dodo Award

Extinct pigeon, coined phrase "dead as a dodo."

Igor’s Dodo Darwin Submission suggested a dodo would make a great Darwin Award Medal. “You’re extinct, dodo!” Great idea. But <cough> calling Dodo dumb does not sit well with me. The bird was a meek member of the Pigeon Family, extinct’ed by man in 1691. This lovable dodo illustration may help us picture the tragedy that humans brought to this bird—and ourselves.

The DODO is a symbol not of its own stupidity—but of human stupidity.

Imagine an island nation of Pigeon Folk (the dodo) pecking about their daily business on their lovely predator-free land. Picture an approaching boat. See the people lining the gunwales with knife and fork in hand. Hear the clamor of cutlery? THAT is what happened to the Dodo Species. Dodo were a tasty free-range meat treat. We ate them all.

Humans Win Dodo Award For Eating Too Fast

Are you aware of the term, seed-corn? As illustrated in The Martian movie, one must never eat the last potato on the planet. To eat the seed-corn is to embrace extinction. To consume an entire species… to wave goodbye to the beloved Passenger Pigeon… to ignore the commonsense Law Of Seed Corn is to embrace extinction.

Monoculture fields eliminated 75 % of crop genetic diversity in 100 years. Brave biodiversity vaults struggle to maintain the genetic richness of the pre-industrial world. Salmon runs are a paltry fraction of our historic bounty. The phrase, “Give a hoot! Don’t pollute.” was introduced to pop culture ‘cuz the human herd does not “give a hoot.”

The human herd inexplicably makes the earth a less hospitable place for its very own survival. Bizarrely, the human herd is showing signs of being incompatible with Life on Earth!!

"humans are incompatible with life on earth”
"humans are incompatible with life" on earth
humans are incompatible with life “on earth”

But Why Cry Over Dodo? The Succulent Dodo.

Humans who care about future generations would welcome the dodo into a lush fenced field, and celebrate our good fortune! Planet Earth evolved a limited number of animals that are suitable for domestication—notably NOT the zebra—and the placid Dodo was evidently a livestock option.

Instead, minds focused elsewhere, we off-handedly gobbled them up with a side of seed-corn polenta.

Bring Back The Mammoth?

Bring Back The Dodo!

Gene Scientists Are Unhinged To Rebirth Extinct Mammoth.
How about rebirthing the delicious Dodo?
Why a Mammoth? A mammal we also extinct’ed because we liked to eat it. We have little room for elephants so what madness here? Well, rebirthing a dodo is not sexy like rebirthing a mammoth. Anyway sour grapes, it’s unlikely the renewed dodo would be an easy-catch bird like the old bird.

We call it a dumb dodo because it was easy prey. The extinct dodo did not startle and run. A bird flock’s startle behavior saves bird lives. Even chicken flocks resist capture. But finding itself on a predator-free island, the DODO dropped startle behavior as a waste of energy. Startle behavior likely eliminated by Evolution by means of reversible DNA modifications called epigenetics.¹

And then the Dodo renaissance began.
Energy is a resource that Evolution uses wisely. Generations of Mauritius Island Dodo were able to devote the reclaimed energy to other Dodo pursuits. Better eating. Jazzy birdsongs? Creative mating. Ambitious nests? Interesting to know! What did Dodo do with its bounty of peace and leisure?

Sigh. Humans cannot recreate the mellow epigenetics of the Dodo in our laboratory. What we can create is the opposite epigenetics—PTSD—in wars, and in lab rats. That is what humans can do.

The Lowest IQ in The Room.

The Dodo was first recorded in 1598. Our thoughtless overconsumption and habitat destruction extinct’ed the domesticate-able bird in 100 years—and we continue to degrade our food sources. And degrade the ecosystem services providing fresh air and clean water to us. So when we meet up with the extinct DODO and compare notes, who will have the last laugh?

Who will have the last laugh?

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1. OPTIONAL FOOTNOTE: Epigenetics: Inheritable behavior caused by a reversible alteration to DNA gene expression by methylation of DNA strands in response to environmental stress.

Scientists once “believed” DNA inheritance carried all inter-generational information. DNA change is slow and somewhat random. The discovery of epigenetics expanded our understanding of the creative ways-and-means of evolution.

Scientists: Often “believe” that only what can be proved true, is true. Unhinged nonsense. Many, many things are true that Science has no interest or ability to prove. Scientific Proof is a myth.

We cannot reproduce the epigenetic changes that tamed this goodbye girl.